Is Sleeping with a Partner Good for Your Sleep?

Feb 14, 2024 | Blog, Sleep Tips

Valentine’s Day is the perfect time to cuddle up and discuss a topic close to the heart and the bedroom: sleeping with your partner. While spooning the night away can seem like a direct route to relationship bliss, it is a bit more complex than that. Research shows us that while there are undeniable benefits to sharing a bed, there are also challenges that couples may face.

The Sweet: Benefits of Sleeping with a Partner

Nestling up with your significant other at night might just be the secret ingredient to a blissful slumber, according to intriguing research findings. It turns out, the cozy embrace of a loved one does not just warm the heart but could also lead to a night of deeper, more rejuvenating sleep (Medic, Wille, & Hemels, 2017). But the perks do not stop there. It seems that drifting off together is also a powerful booster for emotional and physical intimacy.

Simply being close to one another throughout the night can lead to more physical affection, which in turn releases oxytocin, often referred to as the ‘love hormone’ (Drews et al., 2020). This proximity also allows couples’ sleep cycles to gradually align, creating a natural harmony in their sleeping patterns. This synchronization not only strengthens their bond but also positively affects their daily interactions, making them feel more in tune with each other (Insana, Costello, & Montgomery-Downs, 2011). According to research, sharing a bed might be a straightforward strategy for enhancing sleep quality and deepening relationships.

The Sour: Cons of Sleeping with a Partner

However, the journey to dreamland is not always smooth when sharing a bed, as some research points out. It appears that the very act of sleeping side by side, while often a source of comfort, can occasionally introduce sleep disturbances for one or both partners. Challenges such as snoring, different sleep schedules, and restless movements can disrupt the tranquility of the night, leading to feelings of frustration and exhaustion (Healthline, 2020). Moreover, the quest for the perfect sleep environment reveals that individual preferences, from mattress firmness to the ideal room temperature, can vary widely. When these preferences clash, tension may arise, potentially diminishing the quality of rest for both individuals involved (Strawbridge, Shema, & Roberts, 2004). Additionally, the battle over blankets or the struggle for space can transform the bed from a cozy retreat into a battleground of discomfort and sleep interruptions. These issues, though seemingly minor, can accumulate over time, posing a threat to the harmony of the relationship if left unaddressed (Elsey, Keller, & El-Sheikh, 2019). Thus, while sharing a bed can be a key to unlocking deeper connection and better sleep, navigating the nuances of nocturnal harmony requires attention to the unique needs and habits of each partner.

Finding a Middle Ground

Despite the challenges, many couples find that the benefits of sleeping together outweigh the negatives. However, it is essential to navigate these challenges mindfully to ensure that both partners feel comfortable and supported.

  • Open Communication: Discussing sleep preferences and issues openly can help identify solutions that work for both partners, whether it is investing in a larger bed or using separate blankets.
  • Compromise and Experimentation: Finding a compromise on sleep schedules or experimenting with different sleep arrangements can help mitigate disturbances.
  • Addressing Sleep Disorders: For issues like snoring or insomnia, seeking medical advice can improve sleep quality for both partners, enhancing overall satisfaction with shared sleep.


Learn More

As we toast to love this Valentine’s Day, it is an opportune moment to reflect on how we can improve our relationships, both in the daytime and during the night. For more insights on improving your sleep, visit our blog.


    1. Drews, H. J., Wallot, S., Brysch, P., Berger-Johannsen, H., Weinhold, S. L., Mitkidis, P., Baier, P. C., Lechinger, J., Roepstorff, A., & Göder, R. (2020). Bed-Sharing in Couples Is Associated With Increased and Stabilized REM Sleep and Sleep-Stage Synchronization. Frontiers in Psychiatry, 11, 583.

    1. Elsey, T., Keller, P. S., & El-Sheikh, M. (2019). The role of couple sleep concordance in sleep quality: Attachment as a moderator of associations. Journal of Sleep Research, 28(5), e12825.

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    1. Strawbridge, W. J., Shema, S. J., & Roberts, R. E. (2004). Impact of spouses’ sleep problems on partners. Sleep, 27(3), 527-31.